A really interesting thing happened to me in yoga a few weeks ago. I hadn't kept up with my regular yoga practice because it was freezing here in New York and I needed lots of rest after a sacred ceremony I had participated in. I've been practicing yoga for at least a decade, never with the intent of mastery or being advanced, just as a moving meditation, largely for my mind but also as the way my body likes to move. I've never done a headstand in the center of the room. I can barely do them at the wall.
This day was different.
I got into the prep pose; downward dog with my hands clasped at my crown and lo and behold, my core and my arms felt SO strong! Like the strongest they'd ever been. I felt my torso lining up over my hips and the one knee drawing in and there was this beautiful gap where I was about 2 degrees from just effortlessly lifting up for the first time in the center of the room.
I wasn't quite there but the feeling was exhilarating and magical. One day something just shifts and then it is different and you are different. What seemed impossible before is now effortless. And you never go back because you did all the background work and you fed all the demons and you hung in when it was hard and you just kept trying to do it right over and over and you didn't judge yourself-at least not EVERY time.
You lift right up.
I am at this sweet spot nestled here in "mid life." My body has never felt more powerful, more flexible, and more strong. It keeps surprising me! Like wow! I didn't know you could do that! You never did that before?? How is this possible?!?! I find myself smiling a secret smile in yoga class as things that seemed out of bounds become possible, limits are moved past and not for efforting or pushing, simply because they have been tended to and massaged through my lifetime.
It's the same way with personal growth and doing the famous (or infamous!) "work." You keep inserting pieces of the puzzle-a therapy session here, a movement class there, a healing session, on and on until one day, you catch a glimpse of easy peace. Then once you know what that feels like and you know it is within you, you can begin to access it more and more and more and for longer stretches.
I invite you this week to celebrate how far you’ve come. We just went through two eclipses. You may be feeling a bit bruised and battered. You might be feeling triumphant and energized. Either way, things were cleared from your life that were past their expiration date-relationships, habits, thought patterns, ways of being that just didn’t work anymore.
You’re still standing and you’ve worked so hard. How about a standing O for that simple fact? Way to go you.
To be awake in this world is a gift. I wish you a moment of deep relaxation and contentment today. A flash of delight at the miracle of your existence. Have a wonderful day!