I was meditating a few weeks ago in my treatment room when my laptop was stolen off my desk.
It was shocking, annoying and a huge hassle. Once I got past the part of changing all my passwords and cancelling all of my bank cards, a deeper truth started to sink in. The Universe took my laptop.
If that sounds totally bizarre, just bear with me. I operate on the belief that everything in my life happens for me. All events are being perfectly orchestrated for my highest growth, especially the ones that appear to be incredibly difficult!
I have been asking the Universe for some pretty big stuff this year. Stuff that requires me to be quiet, still and undistracted enough to receive what I’m asking for. Stuff that can’t happen when my laptop is like a crack pipe.
As the Head Lady in Charge of my practice, I could be on my computer and phone all day. There are endless balls to juggle. This however is not the healthiest, best use of my time and this theft was a wake up call.
All said and done, I was only without my laptop for two days but it was enough to take a strong technology break. It was just enough for it to sink in that this loss was actually turning into a spiritual experience. A few truths emerged for me that lead to some life changes.
I found my soul pace again.
Your soul pace is the pace in which you naturally function best. It’s the speed at which you walk when you are on vacation. It’s the way you move about the world in all ways. My soul pace had been on hyper speed. Technology gives you dopamine hits whenever you receive a new text/email/notification. Dopamine is a chemical that stimulates the brain's reward and pleasure centers. I had been tapping that lever like a rat in a cage for too long and needed some time off to reestablish my rhythm. After a two-day mini computer fast, I realized how slow I like to go. I could feel my senses heightening and my intuition perking up.
I didn’t need all that digital baggage.
For about a month I’d been getting that little pop up box that says, “Your startup disk is full.” I would root around, checking out all of my files and declare that I could delete nothing. I needed it all. In truth, I only needed about 20% of all of that stuff. Purging is popular right now. We can’t make room for new energy, ideas, or people if our human start up disk is cluttered with things we think we need…but wouldn’t actually miss if they were gone. It’s a loose life metaphor but it feels incredibly freeing to have all that free storage to fill with high intention and consciousness.
I reunited with trust & creativity.
I lost all of my writing and all of my music. Those were my biggest bummers. No, I didn’t back up my computer. I am that person who owns an external hard drive and doesn’t use it because it confuses me. I had to make a playlist for a Breathwork group on the fly using what was on my phone. Normally I obsess over those for weeks. It was all fine. It helped me to let go and trust the process and myself. The week before I had sent a newsletter saying I was going to recycle some material so my brain could take a break. As I combed through hundreds of blog posts to find some good ones to use, I realized that none of them felt right. I write from where I am and where I am is not in 2012. The Universe wasn’t going to allow me to take the easy way out. I am happening now. We are happening now and what I need to write needs to be relevant to NOW.
There are signs everywhere if we can stop long enough to see them. Sometimes life puts you on pause with an illness, injury or loss. I hope you are digging for the gold in every situation that is stretching you.