Forgive Yourself First

I returned late last night from a very powerful healing retreat.  I am still absorbing all that I have learned and am excited to see what kind of writing comes out of it and how it informs my practice going forward.  I wasn't able to create fresh content this morning but intuited that this oldie but goodie was the way to go.  Love you to all!

I bet all of you have at least one thing that happened in your life that you are obsessing over right now.  It could have happened this morning, it might have happened last week, 6 months ago, possibly even years ago.  It creeps in when you least expect it.

It might be the go to scene in your head when you’re feeling weak or tired or sad.  It’s the one that you just can’t get rid of, like a constant self-flagellation brain loop.  The loop doesn’t really change.  It’s just a repetitive piece of memory that triggers you every time you think about it.

We all have those circular thoughts.  The ones where we wished we’d done it differently.  We wished we’d made a different choice.  We wish we could go back in time and neatly splice that piece of our life movie to create a less painful outcome.

While we can’t erase what has been done, we absolutely do have the power to change our relationship to the past.  Today, we can draw a line in the sand and start a new chapter.  Beating yourself up for what has already happened does not empower your story.

It keeps you mired in a place where you cannot affect change.  You can only make it right in the here and now.  You can only move forward with integrity.

The first step to loving your whole self is to forgive YOURSELF.  A couple of years ago, my brain was stuck on repeat on a certain issue.  I was really trying to find a way to forgive the people involved in my story.

I was struggling, trying to use all of my tools and I was having such a difficult time letting go.  I just kept getting stuck going over the same bits of conversation and the same scenarios.  I finally realized that if I was going to forgive anyone, I needed start with myself.

I wrote this prayer, said it out loud and released it.  It is my offering to you with love.

A Prayer to Release Your Burdens

I forgive myself.

I will no longer be held hostage in my own mind.

I will no longer replay events and wonder if I could have/should have/would have done more/been more.

I did all I could do.

I gave it everything I had.

I acted with all of the tools that I have and to the best of my abilities.

My intent was always love.

I forgive myself.

Buddha says, “If your compassion does not include yourself, it is not complete.”  Extend massive compassion toward yourself today as you make your way in the world.  Bless yourself with complete and total self-acceptance as a gorgeous, miraculous, constant work in progress.

You got this.